Fifth Blog Anniversary : Keep On Writing

I started my WordPress blog in Oct 28th, 2008 because I just felt bored with my old blog. It was an impulsive decision. I never imagined that I actually can maintain this blog for the period of five years, and hopefully I will manage to maintain this blog for many more years.

I started this blog as a college student, and now five years later I have already gone quite far from where I was five years ago. This blog has taught me to be grateful for everything that have happened in my life. Sometimes I went through some past entries in this blog and found out that actually my life is full of simple miracles and little surprises. The ones which, most of the times, I did not realize. I know that I always pay attention to things that haven’t happened yet in my life, whilst actually so many great things have happened to me. I should be more grateful.

I also sometimes think that I did not improve a lot as a person. Well, looking at all of those entries in this blog, I have transformed into a better person compared to some years ago. I change a lot in five years.

Finally thanks for you, dear readers! Silent readers, non-silent readers, and people who have been directed to this blog by Uncle Google . Big appreciation for you all! Thanks for spending your time writing comments on my entries and for clicking the ‘like’ button. Simple stuffs that mean the world for me. At first, I did not expect people to read my entries because I just wanted to share my feeling/opinion here. And the initial purpose of this blog was to keep me sane in the middle of those overload college tasks. So, thank you!

I am happy to have this ‘home’ in the cyber-world. The five years existence of this blog also proof me that I could be so committed in doing something. I have been writing at least one entry every month in five years, without failing. This is an achievement, indeed! 🙂

As written on the title of this entry, ‘Fifth Blog Anniversary : Keep On Writing’, I will not stop writing. Hopefully I can still maintain my strong commitment to write. Because you know, writing is relieving! Starting from last year, I have been writing about my most personal problems in a journal. And it’s truly relieving.

Maybe writing is my newfound passion. It’s been hiding somewhere inside myself for years.

Happy birthday, my blog! Thanks for being my best friend for these 5 years.

for those parents out there

I spent my Saturday night yesterday with my family, as usual. We straightly went home after we had dinner at a mall nearby. While waiting for our driver, I saw a young dad scolding his (around) 4 years old daughter. Well, I didn’t mean listening to their conversation, but the dad’s voice were so loud, that I couldn’t help to eavesdropping. He said a sentence , like “you such a coward”. Omg! That’s not an appropriate words parents use to discipline their kids. Honestly, I was sad looking at that scene. Really. But what could I do? At that particular moment? Nothing.

I’m just wondering, does that style of parenting still exist these days? It was the parenting style in my great great great grandparents era, I thought. But what I saw yesterday gave me enough evidence that there are still a lot of parents who apply a “dictator” style of parenting, these days in Jakarta (especially).

I believe that, as they grow up, your kids will learn from you. If you have bad parenting style, don’t expect that your kid will grow up being good people. Okay, they might grow up into good people, but you gotta expect that your kids will have at least similar personalities as yours. If you had a rough childhood and you don’t want your kid to have the same experience, don’t treat your kids the same as what your parents did to you!

I know that being parents is one of the hardest things to do, because the duty is to shape a human being’s personality. That’s hard, indeed. Spoiling your kids too much is not right, neither is showing your superiority towards your kids. The best way is just to act normal to your kids. Don’t try to make your kids respect you. They will naturally give some respects to you without  you need to ask for, if they feel comfortable with you.

Give them some rewards occasionally, when you’re satisfied with them. And when they make mistakes, let them learn from those mistakes. Tell them with simple words, that what they did was wrong. Don’t scold them. Words such as : “coward, stupid, dumb” will traumatize children. Those kids will grow up into people who have low self-esteem. They will grow up as those people who prefer seeking comfort anywhere rather than at home, because they think that their parents will never give comforts to them.

My advice to the newlyweds : if you and your partners feel that both of you, are not mature enough and still emotionally unstable, don’t have kids! You can have kids just when you’re ready. Deciding to have a kid is not a gambling, guys! It’s a matter of bringing and raising a new human being to this world. It’s better for you to postpone having a kid, rather than being a parent who cannot control his/her emotions towards that kid.

Many Indonesian couples who are recently got married, feel that they must have kids as soon as possible. Why? Social pressure! Yup, that social pressure still exists here in my culture.

I’m not a parent. But someday (in 5 to 10 years from now, probably) I will get married and be a parent. So, this post is a kind of warning for myself, as well. And since some of my school- friends have become parents right now, I think this is important.

Couple of words to close this post :

  • Remember! Don’t scold your kids! Or worse, don’t scold your kids in public spaces! It really brings major humiliation for them. Don’t be surprise that their self-esteem will be degraded into the lowest point.
  • Every kids born innocent. So, if your kids grow up having bad personality, it’s your fault as parents!
  • Get married and have kids, just when you’re READY. NOT WHEN YOUR EXTENDED FAMILY ASK YOU TO GET MARRIED AND HAVE KIDS (this sentence refers to most Indonesian couples). It’s YOUR life, NOT THEIR life.

multi-tasker

I didn’t realize that I’ve become such a multi-tasker these days. Well, maybe people don’t see me like that, but I feel like that. I reach a point where I need to ask myself whether I should go on following this path I have started since a couple of years ago, although everything ahead is blurry. Or I should take a new challenge, although it’s against my idealism.

I choose to prepare for both. Since I haven’t exactly got that new challenge, I still keep working on my plan A. That’s why I feel like a multi-tasker because in the same time I have to split my mind towards two totally different things. It’s tiring, but I don’t want to waste every single opportunity that come to my life. It might not come twice. One thing that I avoid is to regret my decision not to take chances that come to my life.

However, God works in His mysterious way. Life works in its mysterious way. An unexpected thing happened to me last week. Regarding that thing, I didn’t set my hope too high at the very beginning, but realizing that I finally could go through that stages, somehow now I want to get it.

But on the other hand, I still love medical science. But I know, nowadays, working in science field is hard, even in European countries.

So, I guess the best solution is just working hard and grab the first opportunity coming right in front of me.

“in the middle of chasing your dream, you might get lost. but it leads you towards something better”

The Power of Hug

Have you never ever been hugged by someone, ever since when you’re born? I believe, there’s almost none of you have ever faced such a pity situations like that. To be honest, my parents rarely hug me nowadays considering my age. But, I don’t mind. They love me to the moon and back. I know it. But as a kid, I experienced countless hugs from my parents.

However, is it true that as we grow up, we deserve less hugs from people? I, personally, disagree with that. When I was continuing my study abroad, it’s not a strange thing for adults to share hugs. And you know what, hugging is comforting. When you have a big problem and you’re seeking a friend to talk about it (attention for boys : yes, girls do this. frequently! haha), in fact you don’t need her/him to give you advice. Because the only person who knows how to solve your problem is yourself. All you need is just a warm and sincere hug from a friend. A hug alone can reduce like half of your problems.

The power of hug is much stronger than just a ‘tap on the shoulder’.

To end this post, I found this video on YouTube. A very beautiful video. On the Valentine’s Day 2011, a group of people in San Antonio, Texas. USA decided to give ‘free hug’ for everyone who passed in that location. And they made a video of it. Wonderful.

 

20 Things

Two days ago while I was blog-hopping, I found someone who blog a post titled “20 Things” which basically tell random things about her. Somehow, I got inspired and decided to blog a kind of similar stuffs. So, here we go. 20 things about me, in random order.

1. I’m the eldest kid in the family. I got 2 younger brothers.

2. I’ve been dealing with science for these past 7 years. And I love it

3. I got so many passions in my life. I was facing a quite hard time when I had to decide which subject I’m gonna take after finishing high school. I ended up in science, though.

4. I’m so grateful to be given an opportunity to study in the UK last year. It changed me a lot

5. I adore chubby and smart guys

6. I speak 3 foreign languages. And I’m thinking to learn some others.

7. When I listen to the music, I pay attention more on the lyrics

8. One of my dreams that won’t ever be come true is, to watch the live concert of The Beatles. Too bad I was born long after the band split up.

9. I’m into indie musics and films

10. I’m a coffee and tea addict

11. I’ve been taking piano course since I was in the 4th grade

12. I’m currently learning not to be too idealist, as a human being.

13. I can remember every single moment that have happened in my life. Should I consider this as a gift or something? I wish I could just forget all of the unimportant stuffs in the past, anyway.

14. I’m a proud Indonesian. Yes, I am. Though I rarely said it in public.

15. I’m a bookworm. Leave me in a bookshop and I won’t complain at all

16. I can’t enjoy reading comic books. Don’t know why but I guess I love words more than graphics.

17. People often seek me for some advices about their relationships. Haha! I found this funny, though.

18. I don’t believe in ‘love at the first sight’

19. I think if one day I end up with a guy who love traveling as much as I do, it’s gonna be beyond fun!

20. Don’t expect me to get married in my twenties. I still want to have fun and pursue my dreams. Wait until I reach thirty, and I’m gonna be ready to settle down. I guess.